Entry tags:
week 10 | friday morning
[ elizabeth is dead.
finally.
rhys sits in the computer room and wonders if he should be relieved. a strange sort of jealousy built in him over the weeks as he watched elizabeth and jack and everything else play out in the game. she grew both closer and distant from him at the same time and he could see it hurting jack, see how he wanted to reach out for her but -- but not rhys. rhys died, rhys had an alien crawling through hims just like elizabeth, and no one mourned him. not fiona. not jack. but they went and saw elizabeth, didn't they? went and gave her their attention, their care, their love. it was sickening to watch and after a while, he barely paid attention to the participants after at all, feeling bile in his throat and a slow systematic shut down of his emotions.
fiona didn't care. jack was stripping him for parts. elizabeth got to live and he didn't.
he's not sure how he feels anymore.
he thinks he hates them.
so maybe this is relief he feels when he sees elizabeth's body go down, sees her corpse shoot out into space and finally end her participation in the game. he thinks to himself, cruel and cold, that at least elizabeth won't be able to go back home either -- just like him. she played jack, made him feel like they still had such a relationship while going to people like jason and luke -- telling them how evil jack was, how he deserves to die. she didn't know anything of jack, not really, the sanctimonious little bitch.
doesn't she realize jack saved them? doesn't she realize jack saved her?
rhys didn't deserve to be saved, he realizes. it doesn't stop him from being bitter.
he misses jack. he misses fiona. he misses being alive and now the woman -- no, the girl who took his place is here with him in death.
he wonders if he should kill her again. it would certainly make him feel better. ]
finally.
rhys sits in the computer room and wonders if he should be relieved. a strange sort of jealousy built in him over the weeks as he watched elizabeth and jack and everything else play out in the game. she grew both closer and distant from him at the same time and he could see it hurting jack, see how he wanted to reach out for her but -- but not rhys. rhys died, rhys had an alien crawling through hims just like elizabeth, and no one mourned him. not fiona. not jack. but they went and saw elizabeth, didn't they? went and gave her their attention, their care, their love. it was sickening to watch and after a while, he barely paid attention to the participants after at all, feeling bile in his throat and a slow systematic shut down of his emotions.
fiona didn't care. jack was stripping him for parts. elizabeth got to live and he didn't.
he's not sure how he feels anymore.
he thinks he hates them.
so maybe this is relief he feels when he sees elizabeth's body go down, sees her corpse shoot out into space and finally end her participation in the game. he thinks to himself, cruel and cold, that at least elizabeth won't be able to go back home either -- just like him. she played jack, made him feel like they still had such a relationship while going to people like jason and luke -- telling them how evil jack was, how he deserves to die. she didn't know anything of jack, not really, the sanctimonious little bitch.
doesn't she realize jack saved them? doesn't she realize jack saved her?
rhys didn't deserve to be saved, he realizes. it doesn't stop him from being bitter.
he misses jack. he misses fiona. he misses being alive and now the woman -- no, the girl who took his place is here with him in death.
he wonders if he should kill her again. it would certainly make him feel better. ]

no subject
No. You don't get it - you don't get it. Jack admitted it to me what he did to Angel - what he did for the greater good. He kept her locked up alone her entire life like a - like a [ Sorry, she's breathing heavily, feeling her own eyes sting. ] - like a freak. She never had the chance to learn her powers and he - whether he loved her or not, she was so engulfed with her own grief -
[ It takes a minute for her to look up when he kneels. He starts talking, trying to defend Jack. Trying to make sense of the brokenness that fills him. Elizabeth doesn't see an ounce of hope in his eyes when they finally meet. He touches her - she flinches. It was like Jack, honestly. When he tries to soothe her so she would see his reason. Her hands snatch up against his wrists and then to his own face, clutching at his jawline roughly. ]
He didn't know! This entire time he was willing to put anyone down who posed a threat as those creatures, but he suspected me - not you. You were expendable to him because you threaten him.
[ But, she corrects herself, clutching onto his face tighter. ]
I don't want the sun, I want you to - I want you to understand that Jack - [ No. She shuts up. She drops his name and laughs weakly. ] I'm selfish. Jack's wrong, but it's... it's not my place... [ Her hands drag and she wipes her cheeks with the back of her sleeves idly, trying to keep herself composed. ] You can't fix a sinner who doesn't see sin. You can't make a non-believer believe.
[ She sounds distraught, she won't ever see it Rhys's way and she fears that her selfishness will - well, he'll never see it her way either. ]
I promised to find Angel if we survived. If we could win the game. There's an infinite amount of universes out there and in every single one... Jack's choices will cause Angel's death. I promised to open a tear - to show him his daughter alive and well -
[ But, she winces: ]
- only to take her from him. I wanted to give her what was denied of me. Freedom.
...I was a fool.
no subject
Hey, I--
[ he starts but then she keeps talking, keeps talking about sins and beliefs and how terrible jack is. keeps talking about angel and how she wanted to tear her away from jack and honestly, it's getting to a point where rhys doesn't really understand. he had watched them, sure, but their conversations were such a blur to him -- the facts, the details, all a mess that he doesn't really get what elizabeth's talking about at all.
god, he's so... tired. everything was so simple before elizabeth got here. everyone left him alone. when she pulls away her hands to wipe at her eyes, he doesn't really move other than to just sort of sit there on the floor in front of her. he thinks for a moment that he wishes he could just leave now, but he knows he has to follow this conversation through till the end. ]
I don't... really get what you're talking about, Elizabeth. I watched but, uh, I wasn't really watching for you. Or Angel. [ he was watching for jack -- just for jack. ] I don't know what you want me to say.
[ he runs a hand through his hair then, not really sure where to go from here because he just... doesn't know. he has what he's seen, his point of view, his concerns and perspective about everything and elizabeth has her own. she's not... listening to him, he thinks, about what jack really is. he knew she latched onto the angel thing, even saw it in her eyes when he called out jack during the trial -- that's why he pursued it, he knows. he saw her pain, jack's anger, and he pounced. that's what hyperion trains you to do, to notice weaknesses and take advantage of them -- even when you don't have the context.
now though, he still doesn't really have the context and he also doesn't really... care, he thinks. her tragedy, what he's inflicted on her through his words, it was just one more thing he ruined by being... himself. by being a monster. one more reason jack was right to kill him. so, the only thing he does care about, he thinks, is that elizabeth took his place at jack's side and it kills him.
he tries to push back from the floor, intending to get up and just put space between them at least. this is getting too much for him to handle, hurting him in ways he doesn't really get. he thought he could follow through but he... can't. he really can't. ]
I think I'm done with this conversation, Elizabeth.
no subject
That's why it hurt so much when she found out about Angel. How - in the same light of Rhys's opinions on Jack - he just didn't get it.
He's cold, focused on Jack and she doesn't know how to respond. She weakly laughs, humming a song to herself under her breath to try and regain control. It lasts only about ten seconds, trying to tune out his words.
Rhys gets up and says he's done and she scoffs. Laughs and balls her fists tightly. ]
Because I'm right and you don't want to admit it. Jack was a very bad man - heh, charismatic as hell, though. Can't fault him for using that to his advantage. I miss him, Rhys. I miss being blinded by him and - [ She's ready to give up. To just let him be because she's only making things worse and bringing her confusion and misdirected sense of duty on him. ] The last thing you want to be is alone, Rhys. After everything... after all of this -
[ She trails off, finally standing up. Her attire is in ruins, her hair an absolute mess. She turns away, trying not to give him anything else to worry about. ]
He was wrong about you. You didn't deserve to be gunned down like an animal. I cared - whether you believe it or not - I cared about what happened to you.
no subject
but elizabeth is so hysterical about this, insisting her version is true and he knows he agreed with her at one point, he knows it's his fault she even believes this. jack was a hero! he saved elpis! he was going to save pandora if it wasn't for those fucking vault hunters and pandora -- pandora is a terrible planet, rhys knows that first hand. he doesn't really get elizabeth's deal, she has no stake in this in rhys' opinion so why is she so attached? he hates this. he hates her.
he gives a shake of his head and runs his hands through his hair again, tugging lightly out of frustration. ]
No. No, you didn't care because if you did, why would you stick to his side? You don't -- you don't have the same reasons I do. I killed him back home, I killed him and everyone who believed in him because he tried to kill me. I was so selfish, so fucking selfish. Good people died just because they believed in Jack and I -- I should've just given him my body? He wanted to kill him, skin me and upload himself into my ports. We'd rule together, my body, his mind and I freaked out -- backed out and tried to escape and I was so stupid. Should've just given it to him then, you know? I didn't realize what I was, why I was so wrong.
[ an explanation. he just needs to give her an explanation, make her understand why he's the bad guy here. he was selfish and wrong and he did it again here on the ship and finally paid the price for it and that was a good thing. jack definitely deserved life more than rhys did -- why didn't she see that? ]
I couldn't tell him when we got here. I was so scared? I just wanted to apologize, tell him that he could have it -- I didn't care anymore but I was selfish. I wanted him and Fiona. I wanted him to be happy with me again and he was, god. He really was! I was his guy again, I was on his team. Do you know how many people would kill to have what I had? I was so lucky, Elizabeth. It was like he forgave me for killing him without even knowing it.
[ he drops his hands then with a sigh, shoulders slumping as he stares at the floor and the weight of everything hits him. he doesn't want to keep talking about this, but maybe now she'll get it -- now she'll understand why he had to die. ]
You... you don't get it because you're attached to some guy you made up in your imagination. Not who I really am. I'm the bad guy here, Liz. Jack knew it. Fiona knew it. Everyone else knew it which is why -- that has to be why they didn't care. It was just a relief to be rid of me, nothing else. So, stop it. Whatever fantasies you've built up -- stop. Listen to Jack, he knows what he's doing. More than any of us.
no subject
But, it's Jack that keeps coming back. She had obsessed with the idea of making him pay. Projecting her feelings for Comstock and her own misfortune onto him. It wasn't long ago that Elizabeth said she would not hesitate to kill Jack if needed - she told it to his face. It wasn't long ago she watched as Jack insisted what he needed to do was just.
Rhys's words hit hard. Enough to make her clench her fist tightly. She wants so badly to strike him out of frustration. But - it's not him. It's Jack. It goes back to Jack. Whatever relationship they had, Elizabeth can't unsee the way Jack uses his charismatic attitude to get away with murder. Literally.
Elizabeth catches herself against the doorframe of the shack, feeling her knees weak but - she's fine. She'll be fine. She has to be - there's no other options. ]
I can't.. help you... [ She mutters, knowing damn well she was blinded and regret her trust. Regrets trusting so easily into someone and - something. ] I don't know Jack like you do. Like Fiona does. It's stupid. I'm -
[ Stupid. She grits her teeth, a mixing bitterness and sadness for what Rhys had become. ]
You're not the bad guy and I'll say that until - well... I suppose eternity is a fitting time period. [ This wasn't Heaven. There... was no God, was there? ] I don't want to hurt you anymore. I don't want to make this anymore painful. If you want to sit in your self-destructive mindset, I pray one day you'll find solace and clarity.
[ A brief pause as she turns to look at him, her expression tired and genuine. ]
Thank you for saving me, Rhys. It was a heroic action and I never got to thank you.
no subject
his arms cross over his chest and her digs his fingers into his bicep, trying so hard to not do anything rash. her words keep digging under his skin though because that's what he thought when he was alive, but -- those days in the vents, these weeks alone, they've taken their toll. rhys understands it now. maybe she needs more time...?
when she looks back at him and speaks, her words hit him and he looks shocked for a moment before it quickly turns into anger, a disgusted look given back to elizabeth. ]
Get out.
[ that's all he's going to say this time but it's low, it's angry, and he means it. if elizabeth knows what's good for her, he thinks, she'll listen to this. ]